Ode to Autumn

I love autumn. 

I love jeans-and-sweatshirt weather.  I love football.  I love the leaves changing colors and crunching under my feet.  I love pumpkin pie, apple cider and the smell of delicious things baking in my oven.  Nick and I got married in the fall, for all of these reasons.  Truly, if I had my way, I would find a place to live where it could be fall all the time!  And two of my favorite places to visit during the autumn season are my alma mater, Hanover College, and a pumpkin patch! 

Hanover is gorgeous in the fall.  Hanover will never be known for it's "college-town nightlife" (unless you count JR's, Shipley's or the Electric Lady...and I don't) but if you've ever visited the campus, you know it's beautiful, especially right now.  So on the weekend of our 7th wedding anniversary we decided to go back to where it all started.  We tailgated during the football game then hit up the bookstore for some new Hanover gear.  We visited the Chi Omega house (and attempted to walk through the Sigma Chi house, but couldn't get anyone to let us in!).  Then we visited Science Center where a friend and fellow alum is now a professor!  He showed off his office and ran us through is day...and I tried to imagine what it would be like to work at my alma mater.  Crazy stuff!  Before heading home, we walked down to The Point, one of the most picturesque locations on campus.

Happy 7th Anniversary, Nick!  I love you!


  Two days later, on our actual anniversary, I spent the morning at the local pumpkin patch with the girls for their preschool field trip.  We had a blast!  The girls explored (aka "climbed on") the large collection of pumpkins out in front of the general store, we checked out the squash and gourds and other yummy veggies and took some cute pictures by a festively decorated wagon...all before the rest of the class arrived! 

The rest of the class arrives and I get my first chance to witness the girls interacting with their classmates.  We took a hayride back to the pumpkin patch where the kids each got to pull their own pumpkin off the vine, which they thought was very cool!  After the kids were pleased with their choice of pumpkin, we rode the wagon back to the store up front where we enjoyed a snack of sugar cookies and apple cider...Yum! 

As the class prepares to return to school, the girls and I head into the store to pick up some homemade noodles, a couple of tasty pumpkin muffin mixes and one more (very large) pumpkin for the front porch.

 I love autumn.

Adventures in Make Up

I know I just posted yesterday, but this story is too funny not to share!

Tuesday morning we found ourselves with an entire day of nothing to do...until dance class in the evening.  Everybody woke up in a good mood, so I decided we should take off and go do something - I just had no idea what that "something" would be.  After breakfast, I went upstairs to put away some laundry and found a bag from Gymboree with my most recent clearance rack steals inside.  The receipt falls out as I'm unloading the clothes to the hamper...and Gymbucks are inside!  (For those unfamiliar with Gymbucks, it's a $25 coupon you can earn during a purchase to use later on a separate $50 purchase.)  That's $25 in free clothes!  (My husband would argue that it's also $25 I wouldn't have spent in the first place, but I'm not really interested in the technical details.)  I was not about to let my Gymbucks go to waste!   

Three kids (and one Mommy) dressed: Check.  Breakfast all around: Check.  Snacks and Bottle packed for hungry tummies and/or bribes later: Check.  And off we go to the Fashion Mall! 

Now, the Fashion Mall - or truly a non-grocery store of any kind - isn't generally my idea of a fun place to take the kids but I decided to give it a try.  We've gone before (the three kids and I) and the girls usually end up making themselves at home inside Pottery Barn Kids (because they have tons of toys out and the salesgirls think it's cute to watch them play!) and enjoying at least two trips to the super-kid-friendly family restroom and it's kid-sized potty, sink and paper towel dispenser as well as a great changing table and plenty of room for a stroller (single or double). 

We were only 5 minutes from home when I had my first snack request (it was their normal snack time anyway, so I obliged.)  I tell the girls we're only going in one store, then we'll head back home in time for lunch.  They've got their game faces on and are ready to shop!  Of course, Gymboree makes it easy when they have PBS on in the store and Sid the Science Kid happens to be the cartoon of choice at the moment.  The girls sit (relatively) well watching Sid and checking out the super-cute Halloween costumes - all of which involve a headband, wings and brightly colored tu-tu (think ladybug, butterfly, fairy.)  It's not long before I've found a couple of  adorable sweater dresses for the girls (on sale!) and some pj's for my baby boy.  Success! 

We leave the store, hit the fun family restroom and start toward the car.  On the way in, the girls spotted some giant posters of Disney villains (sadly, their favorite part of every Disney movie) and begged to get a closer look.  I promised them we would stop on our way out.  Suddenly, they see the posters again and break out  into a run towards them yelling, "Maleficent!  Cruella!  The Wicked Queen (in Snow White)!  That bad guy from Tiana!"  I was about 3 storefronts behind them, quickening my pace (but trying desperately not to run) when I see them enter the MAC store.  Ah, just what I need; for the girls to know there's more to make up than bronzer and chapstick. 

Apparently the marketing professionals at MAC are geniuses.  For as many times as I have been to the Fashion Mall, I have never been in the MAC store...until my kids when running into the store, full of excitement.  There is a display in the front of the store highlighting each aforementioned villain and her (or his) product line.  The estitician who met them at the door, with a smile on her face, had already gotten them a step stool to stand on so they could get a closer look.  "Can they have some lip gloss?" she whispered to me.  How could I say no to that?!  She let them each pick which villain (ahem, color) they wanted and got a couple Q-tips out to put it on then pulled out a mirror so they could admire her work.  A picked a neutral pinkish-peach color (very pretty, I might add) and C went with, what else, bright red (from the Cruella line of course).  Oh Goodness...I hope she grows out of that soon!


Their new friend got them some stickers, which she puts in a little MAC bag, and I finally coerce the girls out of the store with promises of green tea and a cookie at Starbucks.  No, we haven't eaten lunch yet, but baby D needed his bottle and, anyway, now that they had their "big girl" lip gloss on, I felt like we had to live it up a little :)  Watching them carry their little MAC bags through the mall was hilarious!  They looked so grown up! 

After we enjoyed our treat at Starbucks, it was time to head home for our lunch of chicken fingers and yogurt...which they did eat by the way!  (The three of us shared one chocolate chip cookie earlier - it could have been worse!) 


C looks scary in this picture, but I promise it's just because the sun was in her eyes! :)



Just finished his bottle...full tummy = happy baby!

I'm sure glad I found my Gymbucks that day - we had such a fun morning together and got to relax for a few hours before dance class! 

Counting My Blessings

Saturday we were reunited with relatives across several states at the annual Wolf family reunion.  We enjoyed food, fun and fellowship (and even some football!) and reconnected with many we generally only see once a year.  The girls had a great time playing with their cousins and some of the “older” (like 11 and 14 years old) relatives while Drew was a good sport about being passed around as the newest (and last, as far as we can tell) Wolf baby of this generation.  The day was a success!

 As the reunion was starting to wind down, one of Nick's relatives asked about Ava and her progess.  (Forgive me for not being more specific; though I've been in the family for 7 years and “unofficially” for 4 years before that, I still don't remember all the family connections!)  I started with the general, but very accurate, “she's doing great!” I took her through our therapy schedule (now 4 hours a month) and what she's working on.   I told her about the Botox injections she receives in her heel cord every 7-9 months and we discussed her competitive nature which, truth be told, is more important than anything she will ever learn in therapy because, though we have been and continue to be blessed with countless amazing therapists and specialists, if she didn't want it for herself, our jobs would be a thousand times harder.

Still, these are things I discuss regularly, with family and friends and sometimes strangers.  The difficult part came with she started asking questions about how far Ava has come.  And right there, standing in the Ginn's living room, it all started coming back – the parts I don't talk about anymore because, quite frankly, most days I'd rather pretend it never happened.  I went back to the days of 11 hours of therapy Every Week and how the case manager for our insurance company kept asking me, begging me, to reduce her hours.  Not for Ava, but for me. She was continuously worried I wouldn't be able to keep up with her therapy schedule, properly care for two kids and find anytime for myself to maintain my sanity.  Looking back, I certainly understand her concern, but at the time there was no amount of asking or begging that was going to keep me from giving Ava every possible advantage.  And I'd do it all again if I had to.  As long as our insurance would cover it, we would continue at that pace until her physiatrist and therapist convinced me otherwise.  And PRAISE GOD for providing us with the amazing gift of unprecedented insurance coverage.  (Nick's company switched provider's at the beginning of the year and now we realize just how blessed we were to have the coverage when we needed it!  Never thought I would be praising God for insurance coverage, but I am!!)

I stood there in that living room, reliving the early days of Ava's diagnosis and counted my blessings through the tears which were flowing pretty steadily at this point.  It's not often that I let myself go back there, maybe it would be easier if I did so once in a while, but when I do it still overwhelms me.  The hospital stay, the prayers and support, the inability to completely comprehend it all.

Teaching A to walk again, about a week after being discharged from the hospital

Such a happy little girl!

A and C calling Daddy at work - A is wearing her first of many orthodics on her right foot.

For some reason, that Saturday conversation came back to me last night as I was searching the house for Ava's favorite dolls and one stuffed puppy dog (which, interestingly, she was given at the hospital) at 1:30 in the morning.  She had woken up from a bad dream and wanted her toys to help “keep her safe.”  Once I located both dolls and the puppy dog, and made the monsters disappear, we asked God to help her feel safe and have good dreams and back to sleep she went.  I laid back down in my own bed last night with a smile on my face and I counted the many, many blessings that God has given us...starting with my daughter whose unconditional love for life and for other people is an inspiration to me every day.

Moms Gone Wild??

As any mom knows, as much as we dearly love our kids (and our husbands!), sometimes we just need a chance to unwind with the girls.  Judging from the title, you might be expecting a post that goes something like this:


This past Saturday I headed downtown to meet six of my favorite moms for our first (of many, I hope) Girls Weekend! We shopped Circle Center, enjoyed a great dinner at a well-known steakhouse and ended our evening with drinks at my favorite martini bar. We stayed out late and slept in late....it was a crazy and fun weekend!

While all of the above is certainly true (well, expect for the sleeping in part), that's really not the whole story! Here's how my “wild” weekend really played out:
 
Saturday morning, when I left my house a little after 11am, all three kids were whining or crying for different reasons.  I gave the kids big hugs and lots of kisses, gave my husband a hug, a kiss and a sympathetic pat on the shoulder and headed out the door. It was finally here...a day and a half of  "me" time!
 
As I started downtown, I flipped through MY favorite radio stations.  I enjoyed the quiet the comes with being alone in the car.  I took in my surroundings as I navigated downtown, noticing restaurants and shops I had never seen before.  I located my favorite Mall parking garage and prepared myself for an event I have not had the pleasure of experiencing for at least 9 months (since Drew was born)...shopping (in a non-grocery store, no less) All By Myself!  Pretty wild so far, huh?!?   
 
I met my friend Sarah for lunch in the mall then we walked around the mall, exploring all the stores we wouldn't dare go into with small children!  I even got to visit the Colts Pro Shop and fell in love with a fabulous hooded sweatshirt that is officially on my Christmas list :)  Next up, check into our hotel conveniently located just a block off of Monument Circle.  We check in at the front desk then head to the 4th floor to check out our rooms.  The first one we open up isn't ready!  The beds are unmade, towels on the floor and trash still in the room.  We lug our bags back down to the front desk to explain.  "No problem," says Savannah, the friendly hotel clerk, "we want to make this right."  We get upgraded to nicer rooms on the 10th floor and complimentary breakfast buffet for all seven of us!  Bonus!  We met up with three more friends shortly after checking in.  We sat around in our sweats, ate chips & hummus, cheese & crackers and cookies we didn't have to share with anyone under 5!!  We even celebrated our Girls Weekend with a little wine before dinner. 

We got "all dressed up" (in our favorite jeans, though I was sporting cuter shoes than normal) in clothes that didn't smell like spit up and made our way to dinner.  I start to feel really old when I realize the 2 glasses of wine I had at the hotel (over 2.5 hours) has given me a headache :/  No worries, though!  Several glasses of water and one tasty dinner later, I'm feeling much better.  Next on the agenda: martini bar!  Though I stated this is my favorite martini bar (and favorite non-restaurant establishment in the city) I have only been there 3-4 times in the 7 years that I have lived in here...certainly not a place I frequent, I just really love the atmosphere.  We toast to our Girls Weekend and to each other and enjoy a drink or two before heading back to the hotel.  As we're leaving, we notice the line to get in the door is unbearably long and we decide we never would have waited outside that long just to get in...what time is it anyway?  Um, 11pm.  Whoa!  Who goes out that late??  Wait, we did...in college, which feels like a million years ago now!  




Megan, Brooke, Brandi, Sarah, Melissa, Bree and Jennifer


Back at the hotel, we put our sweats back on and get the snacks back out.  Since our breakfast plans changed, we break out the Panera bagels that would have been our breakfast.  Late night snacking at its best!  Now it's off to bed.  Check out is not until 12noon, so we're sleeping in as late as we want!  

It's 7:43am.  I'm awake and staring at the ceiling.  I get up to use the bathroom and realize the lights are on in the sitting room, separated from the bedroom by two french doors.  Meg's already up watching TV.  I lay back down and try to force my eyes closed again.  After about 45 minutes, I surrender.  There's a knock at the door.  Mel's up too and ready for her Starbucks run - any takers? 

We take our showers, make ourselves look presentable and by 9:30 we head downstairs to one of the most amazing breakfast/lunch/dessert buffets I have ever seen!  Omelets, pancakes and waffles made to order, biscuits and gravy, fresh fruit, smoked salmon...and that was just on the breakfast side.  There was an entire lunch buffet I never even attempted to visit, but I could not pass up the dessert buffet.  Keep in mind it's about 10am now and I have already eaten a gigantic omelet, but I had to try the chocolate fondue fountain and tiramisu - Delicious!  Brooke had an amazing piece of apple pie cheesecake that I wish I could have taken home and enjoyed when I was not already so full!! 

I completed my girlfriend-fix Sunday afternoon with a little shopping (again, alone!!) at the Fashion Mall before heading to a nearby restaurant to celebrate my friend Jenny's baby girl on-the-way.  We swapped pregnancy and birthing stories (and am quite certain we scared the non-moms at the table into never having kids...I swear, it's worth it, though!) and showered Jenny with some new baby gear. 




Sarah Lynn, mama-to-be Jenny, Brandi, Elizabeth, Pam and Alison


The perfect way to end my Girls Weekend...and I got home in time to put my sweet babies to bed then watch Peyton's team beat up on Eli's team in Manning Bowl II!    

Many Thanks and Kudos to our Awesome Husbands for humoring us for the night and allowing us a little girl time!  We so appreciate it!  What a "wild" and wonderful weekend!

Baby, Baby

Don't drink the water!  Seriously, in the past several months the number of people I know who are pregnant has increased exponentially.  Some of them are close girlfriends and others I have reconnected with on Facebook, but at last count I have learned of at least one new pregnancy every week for the past 4 or 5 weeks!  When thinking of these moms-to-be (whether it be their first or their fourth), I think back to my first pregnancy and try to remember the things I wish veteran moms would have shared with me:



Baby D at 2 weeks



* As a first time mom, packing for the hospital can be intimidating.  Pack comfortable (maternity) clothes - and don't let the nurse try to convince you wearing that horrible hospital gown is the way to go.  The disposable underwear, though, that's another story...

* Write EVERYTHING down!  I don't care if you think it's unimportant or ridiculous, write it down.  You will love reading through it months and years later.  Sadly, I have done a much better job at this for Baby D than I did for my girls but it's never too late to start.  I also started a "quote journal" to record all of the hilarious things my preschoolers say.  The mind of a 3-4 year old is amazing.  I just wish I could find a tape recorder so that I can record the way they say things....makes it even funnier!

* Take pictures of baby feet, baby hands, baby fingers and baby toes.  Another thing we didn't do right away with the girls that I am still kicking myself.  By the time we did (about 6 weeks) those brand new fingers and toes were already bigger! 

* You're a new mom - don't be so hard on yourself!  You're gonna mess up - I still do, every day!  If you don't mess up, you will never learn anything new, right Mom?  Being a mom is the hardest job you will ever have, regardless of your occupation.  It's also the most rewarding.

* Spit-up Happens.  This one was too easy.  Get used to wearing it, smelling it, and stepping in it.  And through it all know that, when you look back to your baby's first 12 months, you won't remember any of it!

* Same goes for poop.  Apparently organic baby food makes babies (or maybe just my son) go #2 about 4-5 times per day.  I know this is an insanely high frequency for an 8 month old (though normal for a 0-3 month old).  But he loves his Apple Pear Oatmeal and Harvest Squash Turkey, so a few extra diapers a day is worth it! 

* The baby weight will eventually go away...if you work at it.  That "line" everyone gives you about how it took "9 months to put it on, 9 months to take it off" is actually true.  You are at a distinct advantage if you are in your early to mid-20's during your pregnancy when your metabolism is much kinder to you.  I was 25 when A and C were born and lost all 67 lbs in 6 months (with a lot of help from Weight Watchers).  On the other hand now, 3.5 years later, the scale says I have been within 2 lbs of my pre-prego weight for 6 weeks but my shape is finally starting to make a comeback too!  (A little help from WW and a lot of running!)  In the meantime, enjoy the fact that you have a legitimate excuse to wear yoga pants every day! 
* Don't watch the infomercials on during those 3am feedings - unless you are prepared to buy whatever it is they are selling.  Vacuums and kitchen utensils (even cars, right B?!) have a way of becoming immediately necessary in the middle of the night. 

* Try, try, try to not worry about the housework.  If you are a perfectionist like me, this is much harder than it sounds.  I eventually figured out that I physically could not take care of two babies (now three), my husband, myself, the laundry, the dishes, the dinner, the bathrooms, the vacuuming...every day! It will always be there waiting for me whenever I get around to it!



My attempt at a nap with the girls at about 3 mths old!

 *Take naps with your baby - let's face it, you will need the nap by the time baby goes down!  Snuggled up on the couch or in the glider is a great place to relax and cuddle with your baby.  Before you know it, your little one won't want to even sit on your lap, let alone snuggle up with you for a nap...enjoy the snuggle stage while it lasts!

* Make lots of "mom friends" if you haven't already.  Though I was the first of my closest college friends to get pregnant, I was lucky enough to know two moms whose first babies are just a few months older than mine and to have several more of our friends also start their families before the girls' first birthday.  You will still love hanging out with your "kid-less" friends to truly get away from it all...but the relationships you build with other moms going through the same growing pains as you are priceless.  And the lunches and play dates, parties and vacations are pretty fabulous, too!

* Start a Blog or Online Journal!  I know it sounds silly - but if you can find the time to update it (weekly, even monthly!) you will have a wonderful recount of your child's most important and memorable moments and be able to easily share your updates with family and friends.  And that is truly priceless!


No amount of advice can truly prepare you for the amazing and unpredictable adventure of parenthood, no matter how honest and upfront.  But hopefully you took a few minutes to relax while you read this...and remember to avoid those 3am infomercials!

New Beginnings

It's been so long since my previous post, I don't know where to start!  It seems everyone has started something new here.  Three weeks ago, the girls had just started preschool, my baby boy had just learned to crawl and the family wedding event of 2011 became the wedding event of 2010!!  We are all (obviously, my almost-SIL most of all!) thrilled with how well everything is coming together :)

 The girls are doing great in preschool - getting smarter every day!  Once a week they take in a picture to coordinate with the letter of the week and something to share coordinating with the theme or color of the week...it's always so fun to see what pictures and items they come up with for their sharing time! 

My sweet baby boy is already turning into my fast and very curious baby boy!  He learned to crawl just a few days into his 7th month (which was much quicker than both girls) and about a week later starting climbing up to a stand on pretty much anything he can reach: his exersaucer, the bathroom stepstool...the stairs!  Saturday night, I was in the bathroom making sure the girls were brushing their teeth and my little man pulls up to stand on the stepstool, gives me a huge, drooly grin and lets go with one hand.  He looks around the bathroom, presumably for something else to hold onto, and when he didn't find anything within arm's length, he lets go - for less than a half a second, my little man was standing!  Oh my...I believe I am about to understand exactly how different it will be raising a boy after starting with two girls!!

Look Mama, I think I want to stand up soon...

Hmm...I found a great hiding spot under the coffee table!

These steps look like fun to climb...

Getting closer to standing up on my own! 
He thinks raising his hands in the air is going to help :)

Standing up!
(Only holding on to Mom for security, but I can stand on my own now!!)

Preschool Day One, Jolly Jinglebells and other Mommy Musings

A: I don't want to go to Pre-school.
C: If you don't go, I won't have a buddy.
A: I want to be your buddy.
C: Then you better go to preschool!

Another busy week at the Wolf home...A & C started Pre-school this week!  Now, preparing for Pre-school, in my mind, was going to a lot like their Parent's Day Out program (at the same church) was last year.  Pre-school is, of course, more frequently than their once a week PDO, but I envisioned their daily routine would be very similar.  When we went to their Open House last Saturday, however, I learned that I was sadly mistaken.  Pre-school is going to be hard work...for me!  This week, for example, is Green Week.  Which means I had to hunt down 6 green shirts for this week.  (Okay, I cheated for the first day of school....who wants to wear a boring green shirt when you can wear the adorable dresses they got for their birthday?!?) 

Holding hands :)

In addition to green shirts, their snack is supposed to coordinate with the color/theme of the week...and it so happened that A had snack on Monday and C on Wednesday.  (It should be noted that we were in L'burg with my family this weekend and snack was the last thing I wanted to do when we got home at 8:30 Sunday night.)  And celery wasn't going to cut it this week, as both girls were celebrating their birthday on their respective snack day...so it had to be something fun!  Sunday night I ended up with store-bought chocolate chunk cookies with green icing drizzled on top and Tuesday night's masterpiece was Rice Crispy Treats with green M&M's and...wait for it...green icing (leftover from Monday's snack; resourceful, right??)  Friday is their Sharing Day, so tonight I sent them looking for something green to take for show and tell tomorrow.  Whew!  I'll be glad when I finally feel settled into our weekly routine.

As I mentioned, we were back home visiting my parents, brother and his fiancee.  Josh and Brittany have been planning their June 2011 wedding for over a year now...until Friday afternoon.  The reception hall called, stated they were double-booked and that the other couple had paid their deposit first.  After much discussion, they decided to move the wedding up to this December...yep, 4 months away!  Jolly Jinglebells!!!  It's time to bust out the bull horn and put on the Christmas music - my favorite seasons (fall, football, and Christmas) of all time are upon us and it's going to be topped off with a wedding!!  (You know I'm here for you, B!!)



All this wedding talk made me anxious to watch our wedding video again.  It's been years since we've gotten it out - and it made the past 7 years suddenly feel like a split second.  Reliving that day was both wonderful and hilarious!  My parents trying to hold it together for pictures, our friends all looked sooo young, my adorable then-2-year-old nephew enjoying his wagon ride down the aisle and soaking up all the attention (can't wait to bust out those pictures for his first girlfriend - Sorry Ang, but you know it's coming sometime!)...what a wonderful, beautiful day! 

The only thing I wish I could change about that otherwise perfect day?  Me.  Or rather, my waistline.  At the time, I didn't want to be one of those girls who felt like I had to change my appearance (i.e. lose weight) for my wedding.  I was confident with myself and my husband-to-be loved all of me, so why should I care what dress size I wore?  Turns out, 7 years later, I do care.  I was 10 lbs heavier on my wedding day than I am right now, 3 kids later, and in some ways wish I could get my absolutely perfect dress out of preservation, lace up the back and take new pictures in it!!  (Seriously, my married friends, you HAVE to want to get your dresses back out just to wear them around the house, right?!?) 

I can honestly say, though, that my wedding day is easily in my Top 3 favorite memories of my adult life (right up there with the births of my babies) - and just like my favorite songs,  my favorite jeans and my favorite prolific NFL quarterbacks, you should not mess with a "Top 3" anything!

Quiet Time

As I write this, I am sitting at my local Chick fil A indulging in my favorite sweet tea (other than my own) and doing some people-watching! I warned Nick last night that the “grandparent detox” days were harder than I remembered and I was going to need some down time tonight. (Harder probably because the kids haven't stayed overnight without us for even one night, let alone two, since the supposed “no kids reception on Father's Day” wedding we attended in June. I forget how much our parents love to spoil our kids...and how much energy they expend being soooo good for the grandparents that, when they finally get to release some of that crazy energy, it's no holds barred! Which is also an adequate summary of the past three days...no-holds-barred crazy energy!

So I tell the girls Mommy needs some quiet time and head out after dinner. They tried to convince me I could use their room for quiet time, but I politely declined in favor of a location that would actually be quiet. It was almost 7pm when I left, Nick and the girls were done eating and Drew was about to have his dinner, then bottle. All the kids are usually in bed by 8:30pm, so don't feel too bad for Nick who was really only left to fend for himself for about 90 minutes :)

So what do I do with these precious few moments of quiet? Well, I got started on thank you notes for the girls' birthday presents. Something I know I should have done last week, but let's be honest, last week was/is a blur. When I arrived, I spied the newspaper up at the counter but somehow I'm just not in the mood to read article after article of bad news...who needs to add bad news to their day? Even the Sports section is mildly upsetting if you're a Colts fan who was so excited when the team started camp “their healthiest ever” but now every day it seems we learn of a new veteran starter who will be out 4-8 weeks or more. Blah!

I think about this past weekend some more. Saturday was supposed to the the girls' family birthday party – just our immediate families, much smaller than the previous weekend's affair. The girls were so excited to see Mia and Jeeps, Mamaw and Papaw, their aunts and uncles and cousins. I felt horrible explaining to them that there would be no party...rather they would be spending the entire weekend at Mamaw and Papaw's house! They were super-excited by this news, so that certainly helped. But it was hard explaining that Mommy and Daddy wouldn't be there because we were going to “say good-bye to Grandma”...I know they didn't really understand, but we got to talk a lot about Heaven and Jesus and God's love and amazing grace that day.

That conversation came back to me when I opened a sympathy card from our pastor today. Yes, in my church of 3,500+ regular attendees, Pastor Steve had, as usual, been reading up on the prayer list. His hand-written note inside the card read, “Thinking of you as you give your Grandma back to God.” Of course, this made me cry (I'm tearing up as I write this) but he made a very important point. We often hear how every thing in life is simply on loan from God, but the same is true for our loved ones. Our parents, our children, our families, our best friends, even our grandparents...they are all God's children and when He calls them home we know they have served their purpose in God's great plan here on earth and now they are celebrating in Heaven.

I know God doesn't need to read the newspaper to know all the sadness in our world today. But I like to think He knew He needed an extra-special angel in Heaven to help Him watch over each one of us...and He chose my Grandma!

Rollercoaster of Emotions

 Ups and Downs.  Highs and Lows.  My world has been all over the place in the past 96 hours.  I usually have a rough outline in my head when I start a post, but I don't today so just bear with me as I to process the events, both happy and sad, of the past few days. 

First you should know that I briefly considered separating this weekend into two separate posts, but somehow it seems so intertwined that together they will remain, both in my memory and in this post. 

Saturday morning everyone woke up excited...it was the day of the girls' 4th Birthday Party!  We were preparing to have 16 kids ages 4 and under and their parents over to celebrate.  Watching our girls form friendships with some of our closest friends' kids is truly a gift in itself.  The kids and I are fortunate enough to enjoy lunches and play dates with several of the moms and kids regularly...even vacationing with some of the other families!  Nick and I know we are extremely lucky to have so many close friends (mostly from college) all living in the Indianapolis area.  So of course we were thrilled when we started talking about their birthday and the girls asked if their friends were coming! 


Happy 4th Birthday!

So their big day...and all our guests...had arrived!  Kids were everywhere - swimming in the kiddie pool, jumping on the trampoline, swinging on the playset and snacking at the picnic table.  At one point everyone was outside except Drew and I while I fed him his bottle.  I took one look around the house and realized there were at least two diaper bags and 3-4 sets of clothes (all the kids had changed into their swim suits) in every nook and cranny of our first floor...and at that moment I realized how blessed we are and have been by these friendships.  Unorganized chaos was the first thing that came to mind...and It.Was.Awesome!!  So many hilarious memories from that day: Caroline arrived in her suit and was the first one in the pool and Ava decided she wanted to get in too...in her dress!  Minutes later she was escorted in soaking wet by Caroline's mommy...and grinning from ear to ear!  At some point during dinner some of the older kids were upstairs in the play room when we heard a loud banging on the door.  Upon investigating, we discovered two of the kids had locked a third out of the play room and they were all giggles when we found them.  As soon as we got the door unlocked, they all went back to cheerfully "cooking" in the kitchen.  Their buddy Nicholas *had* to change into his very favorite pajamas, with Santa on them (which he calls "ho ho's") before heading home.  And my favorite quote of the day has to be from Evan's dad to his mom, "Hey!  Evan's not wearing any underwear!"  Ha!  We went to bed that night happy and exhausted! (Written 8/10/10)

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Some of our guests enjoying their cake!

That next morning about 8:15 I got a call from my dad.  Generally my parents do not attempt to call our house before 9 when they think everyone's had breakfast by then, and especially not on a Sunday when they know every minute counts in getting ourselves and three kids ready for church.  So when I saw the missed call about 30 minutes later, I knew something was wrong.  My Grandma (Dad's mom) had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer just 8 days before and I was worried about what news was to come.  When he answered the phone, my worst fears were confirmed:  Grandma had passed away just after 7 that morning. 

Shocked, I couldn't understand how everything happened so quickly.  Just 8 days ago, we learned she had cancer and the doctors estimated she had about 3-6 months.  I know these are general timelines, but I was really banking on even a little bit of that time.  Just 8 days ago, I had started planning our next trip down to see her for the end of August.  I did not anticipate how much can change in 8 days. 



The kids with Grandma at her Surprise 75th Birthday Party in June



The grieving process is a tricky one.  It's different for everyone...I tried to focus on all the good memories first before trying to process the reality of that morning's events.  For example, two years ago we took our annual family vacation to South Carolina with my dad's 3 sisters and his brother, their spouses, almost all of my cousins and Grandma.  It was a wonderful week full of awesome family memories - easily one of my favorites.  Because most of my dad's family lives down near Evansville, IN (about a 3 hour drive from Indy) we don't get to see them as often as we'd like, but we make it down for most holiday gatherings.  My aunt had a surprise 50th Birthday Party in February that brought the family together for an unexpected event this winter and then in June we traveled south again for Grandma's 75th Birthday Celebration.  Looking back this past week, I am extremely grateful for these two milestone birthday's, Grandma's just 6 weeks before her passing, because it gave Nick, the kids and I an opportunity to visit with her that we otherwise wouldn't  have had.



My mom, the girls and I with Nana, Thanksgiving 2007





Now it was time to let it all sink in.  Unfortunately, I became well-acquainted with the grieving process just 2.5 years ago when my Nana (Mom's mom) died after her own 4 month battle with pancreatic cancer.  As I began to grieve for my Grandma, I also grieved for my dad, his brother and sisters and, in particular, my cousins knowing the rollercoaster of emotions they were about to experience over the next few days and weeks and maybe months.  Even now there are days that remind me just how much I miss my Nana, so I know the grieving process for my Grandma will not be a short one. The next family gathering will certainly be a tough one without her, but we know she'll be watching down on us from Heaven to make sure none of the grandkids try to go through the dinner line out of order...youngest first.  Though I'm closer to the other end of the line now, and would side with my dad, aunts and uncle who would argue it's time to "respect your elders" and let them go first...it will always be youngest first because that's the way Grandma would have wanted it.



Sorry Bob's!

So my husband made two things clear to me tonight: 1. that he doesn't keep up with my blog regularly (maybe he should sign up for the emails!) and 2. that my previous post is based on a lie.  Well, not intentionally of course!  For you music-lovers out there who were horrified by my mistake, I am sorry! 

Nick came downstairs a few minutes ago to inform me of my gigantic oversight...the song we heard in church that Mother's Day weekend was in fact Bob Marley (I would not forget the feeling of hearing Marley in church!)  However, as you may well know, he does not sing "Don't Worry, Be Happy"...Bobby McFerran does.  The Marley song I heard is called "Three Little Birds" and includes the lyrics "Don't worry, 'bout a thing, every little thing's gonna be alright."  And my over-tired brain apparently thought these were the same song.

The idea behind the post remains - that God is always in control and that we should always give our worries over to Him.  However, the perfectionist in me could not go to bed tonight without correcting my mistake!  And while I'm on, I have an update to share as well.  My mom's second chemotherapy treatment was today and now she has completed half of her treatments!  We continue to pray that her "tough" days this weekend (Sunday - Tuesday) aren't as tough as last time and that God will continue to give her strength both mentally and physically.  Thank you so much for the prayers!!

Marley Knows Best

"Don't Worry, Be Happy"...gotta love Bob Marley, my friends.  Everytime I hear this song, I think back to the Mother's Day weekend message at our church.  Now, I don't remember any of the sermon (sorry Pastor Steve!) but following the sermon our worship band broke out into their best Bob Marley cover (which, I will say, was pretty good.) 

I believe being at the beach is some of the best therapy ever!

Once I got past the fact that I was listening to Bob Marley in church (which was just truly weird to me!), I tried to focus on the message of the song.  I didn't know it yet, but my perspective on life was about to change dramatically.  Later that week, we received the results of my mom's biopsy...a small malignant tumor in her breast.  We were able to take a wonderful family vacation together along with my parents, brother and his fiance to our favorite beach in southern South Carolina a couple of weeks later, just before her surgery to remove the tumor. 

Beach Boys

Since then my mom has started chemotherapy; she actually has her second treatment this Friday.  Now when I come across this song (or any good Marley song for that matter), I think of my mom.  While accepting the diagnosis has certainly been tough, the physical pain that comes with her treatments can be equally trying sometimes.  But through it all she remains a strong, spiritual, faithful Christian woman who never ceases to remind all of us of God's grace and mercy.  Our family has encountered more "faith-building" moments just in the past 2 1/2 years than I have time to share in one (or even several) post(s), but through it all my Mom's faith remains steadfast. 

To anyone reading this, I ask for prayers for our family.  In addition to my mom's battle with cancer, we found out this weekend that my grandma (dad's mom) has pancreatic cancer.  God never promised us that putting our faith in Him would be easy, only that He would always be there to help see us through whatever struggles we might encounter along the way.  He is constantly testing me (us) and I am doing my best to not let him down.  Obviously, some days are easier than others...the past couple months have certainly been among the harder ones.  Thankfully, it's in God's hands - always has been - and His perfect plan will prevail.  God Bless...and Don't Worry, Be Happy!

Wildflower Pedicures

Wildflower Pedicures

Not long ago, my friend Brook and I were laughing about how easy it is to entertain kids with simple, household items.  You know, the "box is usually cooler than the toy" type of things.  For several weeks this winter, the girls colored the outside of a giant white cardboard box (Santa must have left it here by mistake when he brought their presents) preparing to make it a fort.  Likewise, Brook suggested this summer we send our kids outside with sponges or paint brushes and a bucket of water to "paint" the driveway.  Then when it dries up, they can "paint" some more!  Genius!  Just as much fun as sidewalk chalk and much less mess!  My girls, however, had another plan.

Don't look too closely, though, or you will see how badly
I need an actual pedicure!

We were outside a few weeks ago enjoying the weather when A & C came to show me their great new idea, "Mommy, we want to paint your toes!"  Hmmm...I paint their fingers and toes fairly often and I was worried they thought it was time they got a turn with the nail polish.  But before I could come up with a clever way to weasle my way out of that adventure, they clarified their intentions.  "We're going to paint your toes with these pretty flowers!"  The pretty flowers they were referring to are actually the white wildflowers that grow in places nothing else can.  Far be it for me to pass up a pedicure of any kind - so paint away girls!  They went to get water from the inflatable pool so when they painted my toes they would "sparkle" in the sun.  Daddy even let them paint his toes a couple times!  He was a great client :)  So we spent last Sunday, once again, giving each other wildflower pedicures...and some manicures too! 

Making my toes "sparkle"

We couldn't finish without doing manicures too!

Tale of Many T-shirts

Getting dressed for my run tonight, I grab a pair of shorts and a t-shirt off the top of my pile of running clothes in my closet.  They never actually get put away; why bother?!? I often wonder which neighbors I will see out on my run and what interesting tid-bits I will learn along the way.  Tonight, however, for some reason I wondered the opposite.  What do people think when they see me run by?  Often I am curious about the neighbors regularly I see along my path. 

First, I consider what they might see as I pass them by.  I usually wear my wedding rings when I run, so if they are looking closely enough, they would know I am married.  My hair is always up in a ponytail and I'm sporting some solid color knit shorts (unless I need to do laundry, then I am forced to pull the black mesh "UCA cheerleader" shorts from high school from the depths of my bottom drawer) and tennis shoes.  Not much to go by so far.  All relevant "information" they could use comes from my t-shirts. 

So what do my t-shirts say about me?  A few are Colts shirts that I just don't wear much anymore, including an AFC Champs shirt from 2007 that my husband rendered "useless" after we won the Super Bowl that year.  (Who cares?  We beat the Pats for that title!  A great memory regardless.)  A couple are from other 5K's, including (and my favorite!) the one my friend Kristen designed for the 5K I organized in Ava's honor last August benifiting Peyton Manning Children's Hospital.  Some are Comair shirts from my airline days and others have Hanover College written across the front. But most of my "running shirts" are old Chi Omega or Sigma Chi shirts from college - one even has Gilligan's face on the back!  Another one is simply white with a giant black skull and crossbones on the front.  No greek letters or other indicator that this shirt actually had a purpose once (I think it was our sorority IM shirt one year) just a large pirate symbol across my chest. 

Seriously, what are my neighbors thinking?  If they notice me as often as I notice them, they might be a little worried!  The couple down the street who is usually arguing with the windows open, I'm sure they couldn't care less.  But my retired neighbor across the street or the doctor on the cul-de-sac who routinely tend to their lawns during my run or any of the three police officers who live along my route (Brownsburg, Speedway and IMPD...I guess this is a pretty safe neighborhood!) - what do they think about this Colts-loving, skull-and-crossbones-wearing, sorority girl and one-time cheerleader who happens to be their neighbor?  Maybe one night I'll stop and ask!

To My Tresses: Welcome to 2010

So after coloring my hair last month, somehow I still wasn't totally over my "transformation" phase.  Don't get me wrong, I *love* my new color!  But I felt like something was missing.  Enter my search for a new styling tool.  Yes, this hair thing has become a bit of an obsession.

It should be noted that I am one of 10 people on the planet who still use a curling iron on a regular basis.  I'm not talking about fancy up-do's or special occasions.  Nope, every morning that I actually fix my hair, (which is about 2-3 times /week) I heat up the curling iron.  My stylist still teases me about it, practically begging me to at least try a flat iron but, as I mentioned in my last post, I am a creature of habit.  So it only took 10 years and my beloved curling iron actually falling apart for me to give this whole flat iron thing a try.  First I tried a hairdryer-roundbrush combo that sounded too good to be true...and it was.  Dry my hair and style it at the same time - Awesome!  How efficient!  Well, unless it doesn't actually dry your hair.  Disappointed, I return it and decide I'm going back to my curling iron...except there's this great-looking, resonably priced flat iron next to the curling irons I was checking out.  Now, I understand the CHI iron is the best there is, but seeing how I am new to the flat iron game, I am not going to shell out $130+ for something I have no idea how to use.  So this flat iron compares itself to the CHI iron and is a fraction of the price, so I decide to give it a go.  After a little experimentation and deciding I need to become more ambidextrious to properly use this thing, I have successfully used the flat iron to style my hair the way I thought only celebrity stylists knew how!  Now, it took much longer than my daily routine allows but for a special date night or girls night out, I'm set!