Friday, August 19, 2011

"Oh, So You Don't Really Work"

Those of you who know me well can probably see where this is going, but humor me and follow along with my little story about how a late-night cashier was nearly assaulted with the gallon of milk I was about to purchase.

Last night around 9pm I headed out for a little "me" time... also known as grocery shopping alone without six little hands attempting to fill our cart with their ever-changing desires.  I was thrilled to discover there was still an actual cashier working a checkout lane when I went to check out just before 10pm.  (Generally, at our grocery at this hour I have to use the self-checkout which is ridiculously hard to manage with a week's worth of groceries in my cart!)  I generally enjoy conversing with this store's clerks and cashiers and I assumed this one would be no different.  The cashier (who I estimate is in his mid-20's) starts what I thought could be a friendly conversation until he proved me wrong.

Cashier Guy: "Wow, it's a late night for you, huh?  You always out this late?"
Me, laughing: "Yeah, it's so much easier than bringing along 3 kids!"
CG: "What time do you have to get up in the morning?"
Me: "Whenever the kids do until school starts next week - around 7am I guess."
CG: "Do you stay home with them?"
Me: "Yep!"   (wait for it...)
CG: "Oh, so you don't really work then.  At least you don't have to get up for a real job or anything."


True Story...it was all I could do to not grab a gallon of milk and hit him upside the head with it.  Thankfully it's rare to find someone with so little regard for my "real" job or for SAHM's in general.  So I responded with an enthusiastic, "No, I just work all day, every day" and decided to move on hoping this guy wasn't as unintelligent, let's say, as he seemed.

CG: "So you'll  probably just go straight to bed when you get home, right?"

Seriously, this guy was definitely in his 20's so I'm not sure why he's so hung up on 10pm being such a "late night."

Me: "Actually we recorded the preseason game that's on tonight; I'm hoping to watch some of it before bed."

CG: "Which game?"
Me: "I don't know, maybe the Pats-Bucs game."  I had no idea what was recording but I knew that game was being played last night.
CG: "Oh, the Patriots are up 31-7!"  Starting to get doubt his intelligence again...
Me: "I just told you I was recording it, why would you tell me the score?!"
CG: "Sorry, I'm a huge Patriots fan." 

And there you go, my doubts regarding his intelligence are confirmed.  I roll my eyes at him and give a sarcastic little chuckle.  He's already insulted me so he should have seen that one coming.  The girl (also likely in her 20's) bagging my groceries is surprised, "I didn't know you were a Pats fan!"

CG: "Born and raised a Pats fan!  But I don't tell many people that around here."  For good reason, I'm sure!
Me: "I was born and raised a Bengals fan, but it wasn't exactly hard for me to switch over when I moved here."  We all share a laugh...sincere apologies to my brother and dad and friends back home who have remained devoted to the Orange and Black.

I explained, "In my defense though, the 80's were a great time to be a Cincinnati sports fan!  The Bengals went to Super Bowls in '82 and '89 and the Reds won the World Series in '90."
Ms. Grocery Bagger: "I was a 49er's fan by birth, a Colts fan by choice."
CG: "Ouch, the 49er's! They've never won anything!"

At this point I am speechless!  I don't even know where to start...even a casual football fan should be alarmed by his ignorance!  Joe Montana, Steve Young, Jerry Rice...where does he think they played?  Does the word "dynasty" mean anything to him?! 

I decided to stay with the basics, "Well, both times the Bengals played in a Super Bowl they got beat by the 49er's."  Not to mention the other 3 Super Bowl's they played in during their prime - winning all 3 of those as well! 

Ms. GB: "I thought they used to be good."
Me: "They used to be *really* good!"
CG: "Wow, you know more about football than I do!"

That is a gross understatement, my friend.

4 comments:

  1. You go, girl! I don't think I would have been able to resist smacking him with the gallon of milk. I mean, lousy taste and inaccurate knowledge of sports PLUS SAHMs don't have "real" jobs??? I pity the fool.

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  2. Brandi, this is HILLARIOUS!!! I would have hit him too. I hate comments about teachers getting the "summers off", and if anyone said anything like that while I was/am at home with my little ones, I would have felt the same way. It is 24/7 for sure, working or not! Good for you:)

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  3. Matt would vouch for you as a football expert. Hopefully this guy thinks twice before opening his mouth and I am sure he wouldn't last a day in your shoes.

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  4. What grocery store might this joy of a person work at?

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