Humility and Heartbreak

There are not many moments in my life where one sentence can change my perspective in a matter of seconds.  Especially when news I just received was about someone I will never have the opportunity to meet.  

My hometown has been shocked and shaken twice in the past 2 weeks by separate stories with incredibly sad endings.  Last week, while on Spring Break, Rick and his wife Laura were swimming in the ocean and got caught up in a strong under current.  Laura was able to escape the current and swim back to the beach; Rick was rescued by lifeguards but was unable to be resuscitated.  His wife and daughter are now left to pick up the pieces of this unexpected tragedy.  While I do not know this family personally, they have attended the church where I grew up for many years and my brother and sister-in-law had worked with Rick on their wedding invitations just a few months before...it hurts to see them hurting.  Many many prayers are still lifting up this family.  

The second tragedy is even harder for me to process.  On Saturday the kids and I were in the car with my parents - non-stop to the beach!  My brother called to let my mom know that a class mate of my sister-in-law's had been hospitalized with bacterial menengitis and they didn't think he was going to make it.  For all the obvious reasons, I began praying almost continuously for Adam and his family.  I have seen God perform miracles before.  I witness His miracles every single day as I see Ava alive and thriving...running and jumping and coloring and high-fiving (with her right hand)...throwing balls and doing cartwheels...these are all things we were once told she could never be able to do - and that was their "best-case" scenario for my then-17 month old the night they diagnosed her with bacterial menengitis.

By the next day my fears were confirmed; the testing they had done on Adam showed no brain activity.  He was only in his mid-twenties.  And though I was already incredibly heartbroken for this family, what I found out the next day resulted in a combination of shock and humility.  As I watched the sad news, and overwhelming requests for prayers make its way around Facebook, I found a friend explaining to another classmate what had happened. 

"He was feeling sick, so he went to urgent care.  He was dehydrated so they gave him fluids then antibotics...and sent him home.  After several hours he was getting worse and had a temperature of 106 so his girlfriend took him to the ER where he was then diagnosed with bacterial menengitis." 

The general facts in this explation could be word-for-word me describing the day they admitted Ava to the hospital.  We took her to the pediatrician that morning because she'd been so lethargic all weekend and was not eating or drinking hardly anything.  We were told she had an ear infection and was dehydrated.  They only admitted her to the hospital for fluids as she could have take the antibiotic for the ear infection at home.  The high temperature and lethargic symptoms Adam was also experiencing - exactly the same for Ava.  The only difference, and ultimately one of our biggest blessings, was that the hospital didn't send her home.  They wanted to monitor her for at least 12 hours before releasing her.  I literally Thank God for that decision every time I let myself go back to that day. 

I don't know why God chose Adam and Rick to go Home last week but I do know that His plan is always perfect, even when it hurts.  Through the illnesses and cancer diagnoses, through the losses of parents or grandparents, best friends and loved ones, through the complicated pregnancies and family trials...once you look through the pain and grief you will see God waiting to comfort you and continue to love you unconditionally.  "For I know the plans I have for you...plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11

Hopefully this promise can bring some comfort to the families and friends of Rick and Adam.  I am praying for strength and peace for each one of you!      


 

Cruisin' 101: Part 2

In case you missed my midnight posting last night, here's Part One of our recent cruise adventure! 
And the saga continues...

Not what I wanted to be wearing when it was perfect shorts &
tank top weather, but I also didn't want to burn anymore! 
Sidenote: the Key Lime Pie was amazing!

4. SUNSCREEN...LOTS OF IT! I know, this seems obvious. We left from Jacksonville, spent a day at sea and arrived in Key West on Wednesday, spent Thursday in Nassau, Bahamas followed by another day at sea on Friday before arriving back in Jacksonville early Saturday morning. Clearly it's going to be warmer, and the sun will be hotter than winter in Indiana. Case in point: it was about 25 degrees when we got to the airport in Indy Monday morning; it was 90 when we arrived in Jacksonville 8 hours later. But still, it's the first week of March so I figured the intensity of the sun would be similar to what it is during July-August in the mid-west. Wrong. I lathered on the SPF 15, found a comfy chair to sun bathe in and pulled out my People magazine to find out how Kate Middleton was handling the Royal Wedding planning. It took less than 3 hours, with sunscreen on, for me to become painfully burnt...and we were somewhere along the eastern coast of Florida not even halfway to our southern-most destination. Needless to say, I spent the rest of the week in either a long sleeve tshirt and long capri pants or, if I dared put on a bathing suit, I was lathered up in my SPF 15 and sitting in the shade! 



Warm Chocolate Melting Cake!  I actually made
this for Nick's birthday dessert last night.  Still
perfecting it, but it was a good first try!

 5. ENJOY THE EXTENSIVE (and Extremely Tasty) CULINARY CHOICES! We ate breakfast in the main dining room most mornings because that's where they served their awesome omelets and Belgium waffles. Lunch was on the Lido Deck where we could get burgers (the veggie burger was delicious!) and chicken strips or some Mongolian fare. The Pizzeria was open 24/7 – the Le Chevre (I think, it was goat cheese and mushroom) was sooo good!! We opted to eat dinner in the main dining room each night because, again, that's where you could find the best food! The selection was excellent, 5 or 6 different main entrees to choose from each night along with several soups, salads and side items that also varied nightly. There was always some variety of seafood (the lobster was my favorite) and an Italian dish because all of the Carnival ship captain's are Italian. (Your strange but interesting factoid of the day!) One night, while enjoying the live music on the Lido Deck we were treated to a midnight Mexican Buffett. In general, I'm not sure how good Mexican at midnight is for the digestive system but the food was amazing and the desserts were even better! Speaking of dessert, Nick also discovered his new very favorite dessert: warm chocolate melting cake. Essentially a chocolate brownie with melted milk chocolate inside topped with powdered sugar, it was a huge hit with my chocoholic husband! By Day 3, Nick didn't even have to order dessert; our server just looked at him and laughed and wrote down his order. One of our fabulous tablemates even found the recipe online, so now I guess I have to try replicate this to the high standards the kitchen staff has set for warm chocolate melting cake! 

6. PACK LIGHT AND CHOOSE CAREFULLY. While most of my cruise wardrobe consisted of shorts, tee shirts and bathing suits I was very excited for dinner in the formal dining room. Honestly, when was the last time I got to wear a dress (and my favorite peep toe wedges) and not have to worry about how impractical it would be for chasing three kids? Plus, I was proud of my newly toned body thanks to P90X so I was sure to pack my skinny jeans next to my bikinis! A word of advice: don't pack anything that may be a little too snug if you gain, say, 5-6 pounds in 5 days because all you are doing is eating and drinking and laying by the pool...including (and especially) skinny jeans. I tried to be good, honestly I did. I took my running shoes and 3 days worth of workout clothes. I got up on our first morning on the boat, ready to get my heart rate up. After a healthy breakfast (egg white omelet and English muffin) I hit the gym...and waited for almost 10 minutes before someone vacated one of the ellipticals. I would have gotten on any cardio-centered machine; this was just the first one to become available. Finished my 40 minute workout feeling great and quite pleased with myself for following through...but never made it back to the gym the rest of the week. Given the number of calories I consumed that week, I should have been going twice a day!



The platform we were on was shaded, so the water was pretty
cold - very grateful for the wetsuit!



7. BOOK AN EXCURSION...or just show up and hope there's an opening! Acting on the advice of a friend who'd recently been on a cruise, we choose to explore one port on our own (Key West) and book an excursion at another. By far the coolest thing we did on the cruise was an excursion in Nassau that took us to Blue Lagoon Island, a private island that's about a 15 minute ferry ride from Nassau. Blue Lagoon is home to a picturesque private beach as well as the Dolphin and Sea Lion Encounters. I had tried to book the Dolphin Encounter two weeks before our departure, only to find out 3 days before we left for Jacksonville that the excursion (through cruises.com, where we booked our cruise) was full. Completely disappointed, we decided to head over to the island anyway to hang out on the beach for the day. When we got to the ferry pier, we saw a Dolphin Encounters office.  We went over, checked it out and found out there were still openings for the next encounter. YAY! After a rather bumpy ferry ride over, I was ready to see some dolphins! Though the water temperature in the sun was in the high 70's, maybe low 80's, our platform was in the shade and therefore very cold. Thank goodness they provided optional wetsuits! (Although I voluntarily let a strange man “size me up” to determine which wet suit I needed, and that was a little creepy, somehow it magically fit so he must have done something right. After our dolphin, Andy, did some tricks for us, he swam over to our platform and I got to feed him and dance with him, feel his teeth and super smooth skin, even give him a hug and a kiss. Yes, I actually kissed a dolphin on the mouth...and, of course, it tasted a little fishy. But it was awesome!



Andy - the star of the show!



8. GET TO KNOW YOUR FELLOW CRUISERS!  This was easy, especially at dinner since we sat with the same 2 couples each night at our assigned table.  One of the couples is from Evansville (his dad is a long-time professor at my parents' alma mater...small world!) and the other is from Atlanta.  We felt old when we discovered both couples were on their collegiate Spring Breaks, but that didn't stop us from having a great time together.  We enjoyed two comedians at the comedy club with one couple and a few evenings of live music or other ship activities (including the Midnight Mexican Buffett) with the other couple.  So fun!  It was amazing how often, on a ship full of possibly 2,000 people, we kept running into several of the same cruisers throughout the week.  One of my favorites were the two couples we met in the hot tub one afternoon, one from Green Bay, the other transplants from Minnesota to Jacksonville...some good-natured NFL trash talk (one guy thought if he could convince me to trade Peyton to the Jags it would actually happen) ensued. 



Our new friends and our amazing servers!



We had a wonderful time and I would highly recommend cruising as a very low-key, but fun-filled way to vacation.  The best part about it?  Unpacking once but enjoying different locales, the amazing food available 24/7, the never-ending activities and contests so you can be as busy (or as lazy!) as you choose and the fact that you and your spouse/friends/kids are all on the same boat so each person can plan on whichever activities suit them best without the hassle of coordinating who's going where and when.  The one major downfall to cruising is that, unlike practically everything else on the boat, soft drinks and alcohol are not included.  Nick and I are not big soda drinkers, so we did fine with water/tea/milk during the day along with the occasional adult beverage.  And of course, the drinks aren't cheap plus they automatically add 15% gratuity to each drink order to ensure the bartenders and servers get paid.  So suddenly my $7 frozen drink was closer to $8.50 - but the server came over and took my order and delivered it to me without fear of losing my cushioned lounge chair so I'm not complaining too much :) 

Formal Night!!

Key West

Nassau, Bahamas (and the Atlantis resort)

Nick's ideal vacation: this hammock and a bottom-less Corona

Blue Lagoon Island, home of the Dolplin Encounter

Midnight Mexicab Buffett!  SO GOOD!

Cruisin' 101: Part 1

We made it!  First night on the boat!!

As many of you know, Nick and I just returned from our first cruise – a joint birthday present to ourselves! While I felt like I did some pretty extensive research before we left, there are several lessons I apparently had to learn for myself before I took them to heart!

1. GO THE NIGHT BEFORE! Really. Everything I read recommended arriving in the port city the night before, even if your ship is not due to depart until 4 or 5pm. Somehow, I missed the urgency of these warnings. We booked an 8am flight out of Indy for Monday morning with a layover in Atlanta and were due to arrive in Jacksonville by 11:55am. Our boat was due to leave port by 4pm – plenty of time, right? I basically grew up in an airport, so I factored in at least an hours worth of delays (late planes, weather delays, quick-fix mechanical problems, etc.) plus extra time to pick up our checked bags and take the 15 minute ride from the airport to the pier. I really thought we were in good shape. Unfortunately, I did not account for all of these unexpected problems happening at once. The weather in Atlanta Monday morning had canceled a 6am flight, so our flight was overbooked as it was. We board the plane and are ready to go when the captain announces that the plane-equivalent of the 'check engine light' won't go off, so maintenance is coming by to check it out. Twenty minutes later they can't get the light to go off, so they have to deboard and wait for a new part to come in from Cincinnati. Now we have two flights worth of passengers trying to catch the next plane to Atlanta – and many, like us, also trying to make it there in time to catch the connecting flight to their final destination. I'll save you the sad details, but we didn't leave Indy until after we should have arrived in Jacksonville, effectively missing our connection by hours. The next flight out of Atlanta arrived in Jacksonville at 3:55pm – if it was on time, and that was before we had to wait for our bags and take the 15 minute ride to the pier. You don't have to do the math to figure out that I had to start mentally preparing myself to miss that boat. I figured this was God's way of affirming my nervous, guilty feelings that it was too soon to leave my kids for 6 days. We had a lot of direct and indirect communication with the pier from the moment we were delayed in Indy; it is no small miracle that the Guest Services Director of the Carnival Fascination held that boat for nearly an hour after she had been cleared to leave, waiting on us and another couple on our same flights out of Indy and Atlanta. And for her we are eternally grateful!!

2. REALIZE THERE WILL BE TEARS...AND THAT'S OKAY. The tears I'm referring to are mine, of course. We met my parents for lunch on Sunday to do the kid-swap and I had not really prepared myself for what it would be like to leave them, knowing I would not see them for 6 whole days. Nick and I have taken one trip, a long weekend to Tennessee, when the girls were 2 ½ years old, without kids since we've become parents. The kids have stayed with their grandparents a few times for a night or two when we had an out of town wedding or other event. After Christmas I remember my parents took the kids for a couple days just to give us some time to unwind from the holidays, my brothers wedding and prepare for Drew's birthday party. I remember those two and a half days going way too fast! Somehow it was infinitely different this time. As the girls loaded in the back of my parents' new minivan – an Odyssey like ours, but cooler! - they barely noticed that Mia and Jeeps were up front rather than Mommy and Daddy. Drew cried briefly, but more out of exhaustion than anything. I, on the other hand, had to get it together just to avoid the questioning looks from my girls so I could hug and kiss them good-bye. We'd been on the road about 5-10 minutes before I was able to collect myself enough to start my packing list. 

   

   Comfy Chair + Book + Floppy Hat = :)

   
   

3. UNPLUG. IT'S GOOD FOR THE SOUL. As much as I missed my kids, for me it was easier to not talk to them every day. I had my phone, but using it on international waters would have been very expensive. We could have paid to use email/internet on the boat, but that isn't the same as talking to them so we opted to unplug for the entire week. The only exception was when we were ported in Key West, I could use my phone as usual and we talked to the kids for a few minutes. (We also attempted to Facechat, but I probably should have figured out how to do so before we left!) It was definitely a weird feeling to know we were completely unaware of anything going on outside out little cruise bubble, but it was nice to know I couldn't/shouldn't be checking my email, updating my Facebook or sending texts when I needed to be laying by the pool, reading a book (that had nothing to do with parenting techniques) and enjoying the sunshine :)

   

   Enjoying my surroundings while unplugged!

   
   
   
   
   Stay tuned for Part 2 coming soon!!

I'll Never Forget to Remember

Blessed.  Grateful.  Humbled.  Prayful.  Amazed. 

These are only a few of the rollercoaster of emotions I experienced yesterday.  I went to bed Thursday night and woke up Friday morning thinking of exactly the same thing: just how far Ava has come in her journey since battling, and handily defeating, meningitis three years ago.  Yesterday was the anniversary of the her admittance to the hospital and, to be honest, I had mixed feelings about whether or not I wanted to remember, to celebrate or to forget it.  Last year, I chose to "forget."  (You never truly forget something like this.)

Going back to her first 24 hours in the hospital is easily the most heart-wrenching emotion I have ever experienced (and my faithful readers know my family has been through a lot just in the past 8 months so this statement is not taken lightly.)  Recently, though, that fateful day of January 28, 2008 found its way into a conversation I had with Nick. 

That's all it took.  It all started coming back.  The phone call to the on-call pediatrician the night before asking to bring Ava in first thing Monday morning because she had been so lethargic all weekend.  They admitted her to HCH that morning for dehydration.  After hours of getting worse, not better, her regular pediatrician came to see her off the clock.  Thank God for her!  She diagnosed Ava with possible meningitis and had her transferred to PMCH at St. Vincent immediately. 

Once Ava had completed her CT scan and MRI, the neurologist on call that night gave us results no parent wants hear.  There were three equally possible outcomes based on her scans: survival with limited brain damage, survival with serious brain damage of a vegetative nature or not surviving.  (I realize "not surviving" is hardly gramatically correct, but I can not/will not write it any other way.)  Whoa.  I still have to let that one sink in for a while before I really "get it."  There was a 33% chance my daughter wouldn't see her 2nd birthday.  Talk about perspective...mine has never been the same since that day! 

It was at that moment that I began praying.  Praying in ways I never knew I could.  Trusting in God in ways I had never, ever been asked to before.  Ways I did not understand until I was put in that position with my back against the wall.  My choices were simple:  Trust in God, fully and completely, or "fix it" on my own.  Clearly, I am not a doctor.  I've never been trained in neurology or physiatry or rehabilitation therapy.  I have no real knowledge of human body past my high school anatomy class...  My choice was clear.

This is the only picture we have of Ava in the hospital.  I didn't want to remember her hooked up to respirators or feeding tubes - and I didn't want anyone to either.  On this day, the Pacers were visiting with some of the patients on her floor and a nurse took our picture and printed it out for us.  Thanks Marquis Daniels, Jermaine O'Neal (that's his chin!) and Asst. Coach and Pacemate for this good memory!

The overwhelming support of our family and friends made this entire journey so much easier.  I still remember every visitor who came to the hospital and to our home to pray with us and for us.  Every card sent or hand-delivered is in a box in the girls' room for us to share with Ava when she gets older.  Every stuffed animal and balloon brought to brighten her day, and ours too.  Every meal provided by the generous hands of others.  There are so many people to thank - as I remember these things, I still don't feel like I have said "thank you" enough times to enough people. 

Just a very tiny handful of Thank You's for the support we needed so much.  I will never forget to remember the outpouring of love and support you provided when we needed it most.  To our parents and families who watched and cared for Carli for 16 days so Nick and I could be at the hospital.  To our church family (CPCC and my friends at BCC) who prayed over Ava and for her, who brought meals to our house for 6 months following her discharge while we struggled to keep up with Ava's therapy schedule.  To my friend Michelle whose son Evan and his Sunday School class made Ava a huge card with wonderful pictures, stickers and messages - definitely saved that one too!  To our good friends Caleb and Tisha who traveled here from Alabama less than two days after hearing the news so they could be here for us.  To every single person who took time to visit with us in the hospital, some traveling several hours each way and many of you more than once.  To my friends who volunteered to watch Carli during Ava's many doctor appointments just after discharge - Abby, Liz, Mel and Emily you guys rock!  To all of Ava's doctors, specialists and therapists who touched our lives through their patience and dedication...Miss Sarah, Miss Kellie and Miss Ricka you are truly a blessing to us.  And most importantly, to Nick for letting me cry when I need to, for making me laugh when I need to and for never wavering in your faith so I didn't waver in mine...I love you. 

My faith defines who I am and that night is the truest test of my faith to date.  God has certainly handed me some difficult tests since then, but the "choice" is so easy now.  I know God loves us and cares for us and that everything truly does happen for a reason.  God used Ava to wake up a lot of people, myself included, who were walking through this life with much less faith than they were/are capable of.  God has some BIG plans for Ava!  I can't believe I get to come along for the ride as I witness His miracles in her every single day! 

Ava's CaringBridge site (essentially my first blog!) that I set up in the hospital is still up if you would like to revisit it: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/avawolf

Mission: Be "X"treme

The secret's out - 29 has been full of "firsts" for me!  It all started last May when I discovered my love for running.  I have run competitively in a few 5K's and am currently in training to run my first half-marathon this May at the Indianapolis 500 Festival - exactly 100 days away!  Then in July, I colored my once-blonde tresses auburn (something I've been wanting to do for years and finally decided just to go for it!)  Success!  I love my new hair color - just the pick-me-up this mom of three needed. 

Next up on the list of "firsts": the cake.  Baking and decorating my son's first birthday cake was certainly something I never thought I'd be able to do... (And it should be noted that, in an attempt to overcome my computer inept-ness, I just posted a text link to my blog for the very first time...all by myself!  Ha!)  My mantra for the big 3-0 (less than 2 months away now): No Regrets.  No longer will I talk myself out of all those things "I could never do"...

So welcome to my exciting new adventure in health and fitness: P90X.  According to their website, "In just 90 days, you can get back in shape, or build the body you've always wanted. All you need is a set of dumbbells or resistance bands, a pull-up bar, and about an hour a day. No gym membership required."  I longed for the flat stomach and tone muscles I enjoyed many years ago - before I had three kids!  I have been back to my pre-pregnancy weight for months, but tone?  Not exactly.  Abs?  Forget it!  Both my pregnancies delivered via c-section.  It occurred to me recently that I am not exactly positive if my abdominal muscles are even in their proper location.  I mean, I had some excellent doctors but they moved a lot of things around to get those babies out! 

I have heard so many great reviews of the program and I was curious to see if I could do it.  So I asked my brother if I could borrow his DVD's.  They sat downstairs in their case for 2 weeks, staring at me every time I would watch Biggest Loser while munching on my snack of the night.  I had already started running on the treadmill in preparation for Mini Marathon training and I knew I would need some variety to my workout if I was going to train faithfully until May.  Finally last Thursday morning, I decided to get them out.  No Regrets, remember.  Once I did the first workout I was hooked. 

Yes, it's hard.  No Pain, No Gain.  (I'm full of great sports cliches tonight!)  Yes, at 50-60 minutes per day, it's time consuming but the workouts go quickly and because there are short water breaks spread throughout the workout, I have no problem keeping up.  I completed my first full week of workouts last night with Kenpo X (easily my favorite, though I love the Plyometrics workout as well .  Both are cadio-centered - lots of jumping, kicking, and boxing!) 

I was sore the first few days, but Day 4 was Yoga X which means I was all stretched out by the end and haven't been sore since.  Sidenote: I have never done yoga before, it always seemed too boring for me, so this was my first experience with anything outside of the very basic moves/stretches that are on my Wii Fit.  My balance is pretty good and I used to be flexible, so I figured this would be easy.  Wrong.  My body needed to remind my brain that my cheerleading and gymnastics days are far, far behind me!  However, I would love to know who took inventory of all the stretches we learned at cheerleading camp 15 years ago, put them on a video and called it Yoga??   

And my reward for sticking with it?  Confidently putting on a bathing suit this summer!  Because, really, what's hotter than a mom hitting the beach to showcase her tone tummy and  her stretchmarks?!

Operator, I Need to Call Heaven Please

Three years ago today my Nana left this world to join our Good Lord (and my Papa Carl) in Heaven.  I miss her terribly but I like to tell A and C stories about her to keep her memory alive for them.  She died when they were only 18 months old, so they won't have any memories of their own but I hope that stories and pictures will help them "remember" their Nana like I do.

A few days ago, A and C were talking on their phones and I asked who was on the phone.  "We called Nana in Heaven.  She's having a great day!"  They proceeded to ask her what she was doing, then answer their own questions like 4 year olds do.  On this day, Nana was playing games, mostly Candyland, and some cards (probably quite accurate!)  Then she played outside and had some hot chocolate with marshmellows.  Sounds like a pretty good day to me too! 

At the time, I just smiled as the girls continued playing but as I write this I realize how much that moment meant to me.  To know that A and C, on their own and out of the blue, wanted to call Nana in Heaven means they have taken the stories and pictures to heart and will remember her in their own way! 

We love you and miss you Nana!

Valentine's Day 2011

Heart Stripe Red Valentine's Day Card

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The Cake that Made Me Cry

Goodness gracious, has it really been over 2 months since my last post?!?  Happy 2011 everyone!  I know I have a lot of catching up to do so please be patient!

To say the end of 2010 was a whirl-wind is a gigantic understatement!  We had six straight weeks of fabulous family events to attend (nearly all of them out of town, which meant we were home for four days - at best - then gone again for three days or more.)  Fitting in all the Thanksgivings and Christmases every year is already hectic; add in a bridal shower for my then SIL to be, the happy couple's wedding weekend and my son's First Birthday and you've got a recipe for exhaustion!!  And I wouldn't change one minute of it!  I promise to do a post on the wedding festivities and Christmases soon; tonight I recount D's birthday!

D turned 1 on New Year's Eve...and I am still trying to figure out where the past year has gone.  I remember preparing for A and C's first birthday.  The parties (yes, they had three first birthday parties), the cakes, the one-year pictures...I was so excited they were about to be "a whole number"!  It was their second birthday, for some reason, that was much harder for me to accept.  I guess I should have realized once they turned 1 that turning 2 was the next big milestone.  Sometimes the mommy-brain takes over, though, and the obvious things don't seem so obvious!

For D it is different.  Every one of his "firsts" is our last.  The last "first" time one of my babies would learn to smile.  The last "first" laugh.  The last "first" baby hug.  The last "first" tooth.  And last Sunday, D debuted his walking skills - his first real steps on his own without someone standing 2 steps in front of him.  Another last "first".  When D was born, we decided our family is complete. But that only makes all of these firsts harder.  The night he started taking 1-2 steps on his own at the beginning of December, I cried (okay, sobbed) the entire time. 

Sunday was a little different, I guess because I had been preparing for it.  He just stood up in the middle of the living room, gave me a huge grin and started toward me.  I was about 6-7 feet away in the kitchen where I squatted down, arms outreached, and cheered him on!  I was still a little surprised when he took off without any prompting, but A and C were standing there next to me just as excited as I was!  (Nick had *just* left to go to the Colts game with some friends - so I think God decided to give me a special gift that day because He knew I was super bummed I was not going to the game!)  And so I have a walking, talking (okay, so he says like 6 words, but it's a start!) one year old who loves to laugh and sing (loudly) and play peek-a-boo with his sisters, and my dishtowels!!

While Sunday capped off an amazing birthday weekend for D, in the two days prior I had my own "first".  My first attempt at baking and decorating a cake.  For the girls' birthday this summer, I drove 45 minutes to the south side of town to pick up two cakes I paid $50 for that were okay but who really wants to pay $50 for okay?  It was on that day I decided I could bake and decorate a cake (how hard could it be, really?!?) and for a lot less money!  Thus, this memorable "first" was born. 

I have two wonderful friends who offered to lend me a #1 cake pan (thanks Meg!) and her decorating tips, icing colors, and homemade icing recipe (thanks Jennifer!) which made my preparation even easier.  Thursday night, two days before the party, I made sure I had icing bags, cake mix, ingredients for icing - I felt so prepared!  Friday, New Year's Eve, we took the kids to the Children's Museum and then out to dinner (our little family tradition) for D's birthday.  Then we came home, celebrated NYE and had the kids in bed about 9:45pm. 

I got the icing made (I got to use the new stand mixer I got for Christmas, thanks Mom and Dad!) - I actually laughed at one point at how easy it is to make "homemade" anything with this mixer!  I really didn't do anything but pour the ingredients in then stand there and laugh at my domesticated self while the mixer did all the work.  (Nick thought I was crazy, but remember, it's at least 11pm and I'm in the beginning stages of a birthday cake!)  Before I proceed, you know should know that I do my best work under pressure.  Just ask my college roommate!  You may call it procrastination; I call it necessitated focus! 

Can not figure out how to rotate my picture...but you get the idea!

The cake was out of the oven and cooling as I attempted to make an educated guess on how much of each color icing I needed to mix up.  I wanted to match a plate I bought for the party, so I would need blue, yellow and red.  For some reason, I thought this would be easy.  Lesson #1: when doing something for the first time, go simple!  All one color would have been a good idea! 



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It's 11:55pm when my husband came up from the basement to remind me that it's NYE.  I took a 10-15 minute break to enjoy a drink with my honey (Bailey's and milk...mmmm!) and ring in 2011!  Then back to work I went.  Everything was ready so I started with the blue icing.  It went on pretty well, but it seemed to be a little runny.  I finished up the blue (the main part of the cake) and put everything in the fridge.  I figured the icing would do better if it was cold, and I felt confident in my icing abilities so I called it a night.  The party's not til 2pm, when D usually wakes up from his nap...I've got all day! 



The next morning, I found a million other things to do.  Mostly cleaning and straightening up, getting the other food together and entertaining the girls who can not seem to entertain themselves on this day.  At 11:15am, D went down for his nap and I jumped in the shower.  Finally!  I just needed to finish getting ready and ice the cake.  Uh-oh.  D woke up at noon and was, of course, a mess.  He really needs his 3 hour naps...45 minutes was not going to cut it! 



It didn't - he passed out during presents and slept through cake!  Good thing we sang to him before presents!


My parents arrived about 12:45 so I put Jeeps on kid-duty while Mia made a gigantic pan (a roaster actually) of mac and cheese.  I took the cake and icing out of the fridge and start on the yellow.  It looked great...for about 30 seconds.  Apparently the icing was getting warm as I was squeezing it down the icing bag (because I put too much in at a time) and warm icing does not pipe well.  It just melts.  No problem; I put everything back in the fridge for a few minutes.  Didn't work - still too warm.  My dad suggested putting it in the freezer!  Great idea!  Except the decorating tips I was using are metal and while the icing in the bag got cold, the icing inside the tip froze.  This is going from bad to worse! 

I tried to ice the cake anyway, with warm icing.  Why?  I don't know, because I was panicking?!  But as I mentioned before, warm icing just melts.  And I watched as it slid hopelessly down the side of my cake.  And I cried.  I just stood there and cried as I watched my hours of preparation literally melt away.  I escaped to the bathroom to get it together, then called Nick who was already at the store to have him bring home a can of icing so I could finish this cake.  As I piped the store-bought icing along the outer edge of the cake, I felt defeated.  Both my mom and my mother-in-law tried to comfort me by offering to run to Target to pick up a new cake - but in my stubbornness, I kept telling them "that wasn't the point." 

Overall, the cake tasted pretty good and looked okay from far away so I can't complain too much.  But there's always room for improvement!  Come August, I will be searching for a themed cake pan (probably a castle or a princess crown) and will begin preparations for cakes #2 and #3...because it can't get any worse, right?! 

Happiest First Birthday to my little man!!

Looking tired!  I don't think he made it 20 more minutes after this picture!

He would *not* wear this at the party - but a couple days later it was a great new toy!  Boys!

"The Plate" - notice my cake has no red on the outer edges!

We staged his cake pictures and video last night!  

Ode to Autumn

I love autumn. 

I love jeans-and-sweatshirt weather.  I love football.  I love the leaves changing colors and crunching under my feet.  I love pumpkin pie, apple cider and the smell of delicious things baking in my oven.  Nick and I got married in the fall, for all of these reasons.  Truly, if I had my way, I would find a place to live where it could be fall all the time!  And two of my favorite places to visit during the autumn season are my alma mater, Hanover College, and a pumpkin patch! 

Hanover is gorgeous in the fall.  Hanover will never be known for it's "college-town nightlife" (unless you count JR's, Shipley's or the Electric Lady...and I don't) but if you've ever visited the campus, you know it's beautiful, especially right now.  So on the weekend of our 7th wedding anniversary we decided to go back to where it all started.  We tailgated during the football game then hit up the bookstore for some new Hanover gear.  We visited the Chi Omega house (and attempted to walk through the Sigma Chi house, but couldn't get anyone to let us in!).  Then we visited Science Center where a friend and fellow alum is now a professor!  He showed off his office and ran us through is day...and I tried to imagine what it would be like to work at my alma mater.  Crazy stuff!  Before heading home, we walked down to The Point, one of the most picturesque locations on campus.

Happy 7th Anniversary, Nick!  I love you!


  Two days later, on our actual anniversary, I spent the morning at the local pumpkin patch with the girls for their preschool field trip.  We had a blast!  The girls explored (aka "climbed on") the large collection of pumpkins out in front of the general store, we checked out the squash and gourds and other yummy veggies and took some cute pictures by a festively decorated wagon...all before the rest of the class arrived! 

The rest of the class arrives and I get my first chance to witness the girls interacting with their classmates.  We took a hayride back to the pumpkin patch where the kids each got to pull their own pumpkin off the vine, which they thought was very cool!  After the kids were pleased with their choice of pumpkin, we rode the wagon back to the store up front where we enjoyed a snack of sugar cookies and apple cider...Yum! 

As the class prepares to return to school, the girls and I head into the store to pick up some homemade noodles, a couple of tasty pumpkin muffin mixes and one more (very large) pumpkin for the front porch.

 I love autumn.

Adventures in Make Up

I know I just posted yesterday, but this story is too funny not to share!

Tuesday morning we found ourselves with an entire day of nothing to do...until dance class in the evening.  Everybody woke up in a good mood, so I decided we should take off and go do something - I just had no idea what that "something" would be.  After breakfast, I went upstairs to put away some laundry and found a bag from Gymboree with my most recent clearance rack steals inside.  The receipt falls out as I'm unloading the clothes to the hamper...and Gymbucks are inside!  (For those unfamiliar with Gymbucks, it's a $25 coupon you can earn during a purchase to use later on a separate $50 purchase.)  That's $25 in free clothes!  (My husband would argue that it's also $25 I wouldn't have spent in the first place, but I'm not really interested in the technical details.)  I was not about to let my Gymbucks go to waste!   

Three kids (and one Mommy) dressed: Check.  Breakfast all around: Check.  Snacks and Bottle packed for hungry tummies and/or bribes later: Check.  And off we go to the Fashion Mall! 

Now, the Fashion Mall - or truly a non-grocery store of any kind - isn't generally my idea of a fun place to take the kids but I decided to give it a try.  We've gone before (the three kids and I) and the girls usually end up making themselves at home inside Pottery Barn Kids (because they have tons of toys out and the salesgirls think it's cute to watch them play!) and enjoying at least two trips to the super-kid-friendly family restroom and it's kid-sized potty, sink and paper towel dispenser as well as a great changing table and plenty of room for a stroller (single or double). 

We were only 5 minutes from home when I had my first snack request (it was their normal snack time anyway, so I obliged.)  I tell the girls we're only going in one store, then we'll head back home in time for lunch.  They've got their game faces on and are ready to shop!  Of course, Gymboree makes it easy when they have PBS on in the store and Sid the Science Kid happens to be the cartoon of choice at the moment.  The girls sit (relatively) well watching Sid and checking out the super-cute Halloween costumes - all of which involve a headband, wings and brightly colored tu-tu (think ladybug, butterfly, fairy.)  It's not long before I've found a couple of  adorable sweater dresses for the girls (on sale!) and some pj's for my baby boy.  Success! 

We leave the store, hit the fun family restroom and start toward the car.  On the way in, the girls spotted some giant posters of Disney villains (sadly, their favorite part of every Disney movie) and begged to get a closer look.  I promised them we would stop on our way out.  Suddenly, they see the posters again and break out  into a run towards them yelling, "Maleficent!  Cruella!  The Wicked Queen (in Snow White)!  That bad guy from Tiana!"  I was about 3 storefronts behind them, quickening my pace (but trying desperately not to run) when I see them enter the MAC store.  Ah, just what I need; for the girls to know there's more to make up than bronzer and chapstick. 

Apparently the marketing professionals at MAC are geniuses.  For as many times as I have been to the Fashion Mall, I have never been in the MAC store...until my kids when running into the store, full of excitement.  There is a display in the front of the store highlighting each aforementioned villain and her (or his) product line.  The estitician who met them at the door, with a smile on her face, had already gotten them a step stool to stand on so they could get a closer look.  "Can they have some lip gloss?" she whispered to me.  How could I say no to that?!  She let them each pick which villain (ahem, color) they wanted and got a couple Q-tips out to put it on then pulled out a mirror so they could admire her work.  A picked a neutral pinkish-peach color (very pretty, I might add) and C went with, what else, bright red (from the Cruella line of course).  Oh Goodness...I hope she grows out of that soon!


Their new friend got them some stickers, which she puts in a little MAC bag, and I finally coerce the girls out of the store with promises of green tea and a cookie at Starbucks.  No, we haven't eaten lunch yet, but baby D needed his bottle and, anyway, now that they had their "big girl" lip gloss on, I felt like we had to live it up a little :)  Watching them carry their little MAC bags through the mall was hilarious!  They looked so grown up! 

After we enjoyed our treat at Starbucks, it was time to head home for our lunch of chicken fingers and yogurt...which they did eat by the way!  (The three of us shared one chocolate chip cookie earlier - it could have been worse!) 


C looks scary in this picture, but I promise it's just because the sun was in her eyes! :)



Just finished his bottle...full tummy = happy baby!

I'm sure glad I found my Gymbucks that day - we had such a fun morning together and got to relax for a few hours before dance class!